Magnificent Marvelous Women

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46rEgKhTJms&NR=1

The world seems so cold
When I face so much all alone
A little scared to move on
And knowing how fast I have grown

And I wonder just where I fit in
Oh, the vision alive in my head
Oh yes

I will be
Strong on my own
I will see through the rain
I will find my way
I will keep on
Traveling this road
Till I finally reach my dream
Till I’m living, and I’m breathing
My destiny, yeah yeah

I can’t let go now
Even when darkness surrounds
But if I hold on, yeah yeah
I will show the world
All the things that you never expected to see
From little old me, this Pittsburgh girl

And I wonder just where my place is
Close my eyes and I remind myself this
Oh, yeah yeah

I will be
Strong on my own
I will see through the rain
I will find my way
I will keep on
Traveling this road
Till I finally reach my dream
Till I’m living, and I’m breathing
My destiny, oh, oh

It comforts me
Ooh, it keeps me
Alive each day of my life
Always guiding me, and
Providing me
With the hope I desperately need

Well I gotta believe
There’s something out there meant for me
Oh, I get on my knees
Praying I will receive
The courage to grow and the faith to know

That I will be
Strong on my own
I will see through the rain
I will find my way
I will keep on, uh
Traveling this road
Till I finally reach my dream
Till I’m living, and I’m breathing
My destiny
Yeah

“There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom” Anais Nin

The above quote is the reason why we should beat resistance, because there may just become a time when not beating it, and not doing your life’s work, what you were meant to do, not growing into your full potential, will be more painful than the pain it will take to change and grow.

Here is what resistance is for me………..

I was supposed to start this article five hours ago. Then I realised that I needed more tea bags. Then I needed to go for a walk to clear my head, then I started and felt a brick in my stomach and friend called so I went for a walk with her, hoping that she would inspire me to write this.

The fact of the matter is, I LOVE to write, and, even more so, I love to write about anything to do with personal development/empowerment, life. Yet you wouldn’t have thought it with the way I was avoiding  it as though it was some deadly disease. It’s called resistance, and resistance almost beat me today. It creeps up on us when we are about to pursue the thing we love the most, the thing we were born to do.

Resistance is the thing that will have me believe that I absolutely need more tea otherwise I can’t write, and it’s a thing that feels like a brick in your stomach weighing you down, keeping you paralysed, unable to move or feel, or even remember what you were supposed to be doing.  It gives you a huzzy fead (oh sorry I meant to say fuzzy head).Resistance will  bully you and tell you that you are no good at it anyway so why bother. (more tea!) Resistance is absolutely real, it  is fear.

When I have coached people about fear, often the response has been “I don’t think I have any fear about doing this, I just don’t have enough…..(fill in the excuses) ” Because to admit that you have fear makes you look weak, but if you have a REAL excuse then it’s ok, it validates you not living the life you would love to live, the life you were born to live where you are living your full potential and everything flows. Yet resistance is really clever because it creates excuses that are actually real, and appear real. Like I don’t have any money, I have to look after my mother, I need to study for these exams first, there is no way I could ever move to that country because so and so needs me.

 They are all excuses we have unconsciously created. We create the illusion of being trapped so we don’t have to do what we REALLY want to do. The thing that would ultimately make us feel good about ourselves. Do you see the paradox?

After reading War of Art, I will never again underestimate the power resistance has over our minds and our lives. I would recommend this book to anyone who is attempting a new project, no matter how large or small.

For some reason I think I may have had this ridiculous dellusion that, the older I got, the more I would beat resistance, and the more resistance would probably disappear. But the crazy thing was, I think the actual resistance was that I was waiting to get older, for my resistance to go away before I REALLY lived my passion. How ridiculous is that? All unconscious at the end of the day but it’s hilarious when I think about it.

And NOW we have all sorts of things to distract us from what we really love to do. We have facebook, twitter, i phones, all number of things to keep us busy and distract us.

So… anyway, resistance is beating me and I am going to the shop AGAIN to get some more teabags as the ones I bought were decaf, I will no doubt find more things to distract me on my way. But look,  if this rambling post has inspired ANYONE to recognise and beat their resistance, I have done some good today.

Oh, and if you are still feeling really really stuck ask yourself, “What am I afraid of? This works!

Posted on: July 29, 2010

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Investing in the journey towards empowerment

All you have to do today is walk through the self help section of a western book store and you will most likely see “empowered” stamped all over. And yes, whilst we do all know that empowered means to be somewhat in one’s power, to own your power, to be at one with your power, to be “powerful” as a human being. Or, however we want to talk about it. Are these not just words? Do we really know what to be empowered means? Doesn’t it make sense to talk about this?

Have we really yet mastered what it means to be living as an empowered person? Or maybe the question should be, have we really even defined what it means to be living an empowered life?

I feel led to write an article about this because it seems easy for a word to become a “feel good” keyword of the time, and for it to be slipped into our vocabulary and repeated over cocktails with girlfriends as a way of affirming who we are, and written as part of our intentions for the coming year “To become more empowered”.

Don’t get me wrong, I think this is all great, and it’s really really wonderful to be talking about being empowered, and I am really really glad we are talking about it as a statement today, as it sets the wheels in motion for it to keep happening.

However I do feel the need to go a little deeper, without getting too crazy deep, so that we can be aware of, well basically if we are really “living” empowerment or if we are simply talking about it and then walking around with goggles on and not applying it to our whole lives.

It’s kind of similar to reading a self help book and being totally inspired by it, and then not really applying the concepts in your life.

It’s easy to convince yourself of the former i.e. that inspired  means“applying” (believe me I have been there, and once again NOT dissing self help book as I think there are many awesome ones out there). When we describe being empowered in our lives we may see this as a result of making our own decisions, earning our own money and not being dependant on anyone else, or working towards this reality, and generally being responsible for our lives and making things happen..

There is just another aspect I need to mention, this topic reminds me of the Pocahontas song I keep singing in the shower, “If you walk the footsteps of a stranger, you learn the things you never knew you never knew”. In my experience empowerment is something that needs to be pursued in a very trusting way, it’s like going into the unknown. I know my feelings of empowerment are much stronger than they were a few years ago, and I am so glad I trusted myself to keep growing. Now I am experiencing feelings of power that I never thought possible, because I hadn’t learnt it from anyone, I simply didn’t know it was possible, even though I had read about “being empowered” it didn’t make sense to me until I grew into it myself, and I am sure there are still things “that I don’t know that I don’t know”. I arrived at where I am today through sheer gut instinct and trusting that somehow there were more breakthroughs that needed to be made, and that they would be well worth the investment.

When I think about what coaching is all about, and why I am so passionate about it., I relate it a lot to this topic. When you make the decision to hire a coach, it’s about setting a goal and achieving it but it is so much more than that. It is a magical process of going into the unknown. It is full of surprises and turning unexpected corners, whilst realising that it is a complete investment in yourself and the world around you. It is a journey towards finding your own light, and that’s what being empowered means for me.

As Marianne Williamson says “As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same”. As we evolve into our power, we are reaching new heights and inspiring other people to do the same, we are creating excitement and possibility for those around us.  We are shifting paradigms and opening up doorways.

So empowerment is so much more than you could ever think it is, it is a world of exploration and of infinite potential. Commit to going down that road of trust and you will be constantly amazed. I know I am!!

Books related to empowerment that you need to read are:

A return to Love -Marianne Williamson

The answer is simple – Sonia Choquette

The Empowered Woman by Sonny Carroll

The Empowered Woman, she moves through the world with a sense of confidence and grace. Her once reckless spirit now tempered by wisdom.

Quietly, yet firmly, she speaks her truth without doubt or hesitation and the life she leads is of her own creation. She now understands what it means to live and let live.

How much to ask for herself and how much to give. She has a strong, yet generous heart and the inner beauty she emanates truly sets her apart.

Like the mythical Phoenix, she has risen from the ashes and soared to a new plane of existence, unfettered by the things that once that posed such resistance. Her senses now heightened, she sees everything so clearly.

 She hears the wind rustling through the trees; beckoning her to live the dreams she holds so dearly. She feels the softness of her hands and muses at the strength that they possess.

Her needs and desires she has learned to express. She has tasted the bitter and savored the sweet fruits of life, overcome adversity and pushed past heartache and strife.

And the one thing she never understood, she now knows to be true, it all begins and ends with you.

“Yes is a world and in this world of yes are all worlds” E.E. Cummings

I saw this quote yesterday and I instantly thought, this HAS to be a blog post!

Yes really IS a world that we choose to enter into. Once we start saying yes to life, a whole other world with so many miracles opens up for us.

So – How do YOU say yes to life?

Me? Well YES for me is showing up in life. It’s living authentically and with purpose. It is about doing every day things just with pure love and awareness, not out of obligation or auto reaction.

I say yes to the people I choose to be around, and the way I choose to spend my precious time on this planet.

I am not just talking about big things here either, even going to the grocery store can be act of saying yes to life. You have the ability to consciously choose foods that are good for you, the planet, and foods that raise your vibration. You have the abillity to be loving and kind towards shop assistants. To be present whilst carrying out what could otherwise be thought of as a mundane, routine necessity is saying YES to life!

Of course saying no to things can also be an act of saying yes to life.  Choosing not to spend time doing something that won’t be of benefit to you or those around you, is an act of cherishing and celebrating yourself.

Saying yes to life is an act of recognising the abundance of power and choices you have available to you. Saying “no” can be so so liberating, (I wrote alot about this in my previous post).

Say yes to life in whichever way serves you, it could be a totally a different experience for you. For me it’s about observing the flow and cycles of life and being a fully integrated player in this amazing thing called life!!

How will YOU say yes to life more? Your comments are welcome!!

 

The most gigantic life lesson I think I have learnt since I have been here is dealing with the fact that sometimes I am going to be unpopular. Sometimes I just won’t be able to play the superwoman role and find a win win situation for everybody.

Sometimes I really am going to piss people off,  I am going to have to speak my truth and do what’s best for me, and then put my steel cap on and ride the consequent storm.

I have known all along that part of being a magnificent woman is not about pleasing people all of the time. It’s about speaking your truth and staying open and loving,whilst preserving your energy. I also know that, whilst many of us are aware of the value of recognising we don’t have to be perfect. I also know from experience that this ingrained drive to please and not rock the boat with the people around us can creep up on us in life without knowing.

I’ll talk more about this later. For now though I want to offer some advice for staying centred and connected to yourself, and keeping your own priorities in mind:

  • Keep a journal, write in whatever format you feel lead. If you are new to keeping a journal just notice how you feel when you start putting pen to paper, and the words flow out of you. Journalling is great for developing your inner guidance, as well and staying grounded, solutions to challenges you are mulling over often come to you once you start writing.
  • Go for walks and get out of your head, have alone time, make sure you  are in tune with how you are living your life. Ask yourself if you are living a purpose driven life on your terms, or if you are slipping into responding to other peoples needs due to a people pleasing drive.
  • Do things that make YOU feel good – I know all of this sounds so simple but how often do we end up doing things that don’t make us feel good as an automatic reaction to feeling the need to help someone else, or because of those lingering “shoulds” in our heads. Forget perceived obligations and tke time out to do things you enjoy!
  • Be aware – say to yourself at least a few times a day “I am aware”. This will open your eyes up to things around you and how you react to them. Being more aware will enable you to nip any people pleasing behaviour in the bud.

Have fun and remember to stay true to that authentic you!

Magnificent Women

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